Ever felt the wind of a whisper in your ear? A voluptuous, sensuous stranger confessing their love for you’re unending and conquering beauty? Whispering the sweet nothings to the likes of; “Your perfect in your every imperfection.” Me neither, can anyone else taste that bile? haha, In all honesty the things we love the most are perfect abominations of imperfection. They are grand culminations of fumbling, fumbling around in the obscurity that is our unpredictable universe.
To view the world through a lens of perfection is powerful. Powerful enough to give you some of the deepest feelings of contentment and joy you will experience on the planet. Needless to be said something with this sort of power can be your greatest ally and worst enemy.
So what is perfection?
Lets take a closer look at the Oxford definition for the word “Perfect,” and break it down,
“Having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or charateristics; as good as it is possible to be:” The Oxford dictionary
Already I am sure you can see the conundrum of imperfections in this definition. Personally, I believe the wild yet inspiring word “possible” is largely responsible for messing this tidy little “perfect” dream up. It rings of hope and inspires determination but (please emphasize this BUT), without guiding parameters the word “possible” is quite possibly the worst possible word around. Seriously though, “Possible” without guidelines is meaningless.
“Given enough time, anything is possible,“ and this quite neatly brings us to the first parameter we need to include in our redefinition of perfection.
If you look at something long enough with the intention to find its flaws or imperfections, you will find it. If you look at something long enough with the intention of finding its perfection, you will find it. “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Bible, Matthew 7:7)
The solution: Give yourself ample time to do what you set out to do and then make a BEHEMOTH effort to always “Let go,” on time. Make letting go the point of completion, not completing a masterpiece. This is the practice of acceptance. Accepting your current limitations and imperfections. Like everything in life, it’s practice; it’s a seed that needs watering, a muscle that needs exercise and as any rusty old artist will tell you it’s the unintentional imperfections in a piece that creates its perfection.
A REALISTIC GOAL
If the goal is a measure and we fail to define it justly then we will incessantly ache our tender backs to only achieve a completely unsatisfactory and never ending reach. We know that everything we “complete” will still have desirables if we look for them. We must therefore draw the line in imperfect soil. We must acknowledge our weaknesses and be happy with them. Furthermore we must find perfection in them. We must use the word MUST and stick to it. “We must shift our focus from creating the masterpiece of our lives to a creating a stamp in our journey of creation.”
It is in defining a realistic goal that we can distinguish the neurotic vs. normal perfectionist, or unhealthy vs. healthy egocentric attitude. It is in defining a realistic goal that we can eradicate the illness of excessive stress and intolerance of anything short of perfection.
So what is a “Realistic” goal? A realistic goal is an undefined one. In this magical existence of twists and turns you do not know what is going to happen, if you haven’t learnt that yet you sure will. If your goal has round edges and is loose in the hips it makes achieving it a lot easier. Not that I am asking for more ambiguity in the world, It just still needs defining. Straight loose at the hips leaves too much wiggle room for endless desirables. If it is simple enough then you will always achieve it. Essentially all goals are rooted in simplicity. It is the simple goal of becoming better and doing better. If you ask us, experience is your teacher so merely doing is the biggest achievement of your goal. “Make your goals around completion and doing rather than what it is your outcome. “
The GOOD, BAD and the STING
So now we are poised to create Perfection. We’ve forgotten what Oxford tells us perfection is and we have made sure to include time and a realistic goal into creating perfection but alas there is one more thing to seriously consider. Fear. Our unending ability to find the logic that best keeps us comfortable. That best keeps our fears all locked up so for now, just for today, we can enjoy what a lovely day it is.
The main reason a human being would want to create something “Perfect” in the Oxford sense of the word would be to ensure their safety and prevent persecution. Ok, sit down in your favorite chair, hold a pillow and take a deep breath, here’s the bad news:
There is no other option, there’s no escape. You are bound to be ridiculed for putting yourself out there. People see what they want in you and you can’t control that. For the most part people will reflect their own shortcomings and have no problems sending it your way. Sad, but its simply bound to happen. Be prepared for a sting as you rise above it. If you’ve been stung in the past its time to hone in on it and make ample effort to get over it. Its going to take some mega-balls so grow a pair ;).
Heres the good news:
Some people will love what you do, be inspired by it, and consequently inspire others. Wait, theres more. Some people might give you a dose of truth. Some way to improve what you are doing. And its probably going to sting too. Ok, its definitely going to sting! So get ready for the sting. It’s only your ego dying and it’s allowing you to build antibodies and become better at what you are doing.
I count three helpful responses and two with stings. Those are good odds. What’s to loose? Doing nothing stings a lot worse and you will end up with nothing.
Perfection is unique to every individual, a mere abstraction of the mind. I believe we all, maybe unknowingly, strive for perfection. Its where we feel we have strayed from perfection that leaves us empty and at a loss about the progress we have made in our lives. In its most basic sense it holds the key to survival at the biological level; to create an existence free of inertia.
If you were to take anything positive out of this post let it be this. That little whisper I mentioned at the beginning. Let it be your own whisper, because the truth is you are in fact perfect in all your imperfections. It’s not a sentiment or a weightless comment, it is the stone cold truth. So stick it in a pill and swallow daily.